Tuesday 26 June 2012

So Ovaltine...

Well I'm a not sure what has happened these past few months its a blur and the flash backs keep coming back. I ought to annul my marriage to the sheep skin rug from Las Vegas. Keeps following me about. I think it needs a good wash rugs shouldn't walk. Or bleet. Baaaa....
Well one story from my adventures is this, don't ask me where it happened, all I know is my air miles have gone up and I can now have 5 free round the world flights.
So back to my story. I mentioned the Ovaltine experience the other day involving a jar. Well I was pottering down a table somewhere minding my own business when some one opened a window, I'd just had a pee so was feeling light and relatively booze free (we hamsters have huge pees for our size) so when this hurricane of a gust comes through the window it starts blowing me backwards. I felt like I was in a wind tunnel cheeks flapping and the lot. I tried digging my claws into the table. Then I remembered despite what Albert Squirrel had told me, I'm not actually a cat. That didn't work.
for some reason the floor of this building had a lot of jars on the floor mostly about half full or half empty which ever floats your boat and I was heading for them, backwards. And fast.
I decided to go with this so managed to turn myself around and strike a diving pose so I had an areoplane like streamline, with a beer belly, teemed with a few aerial maneuvers this was quite fun actually, even managed to pull my pouch flask out for a quick tipple I made martini-mid-air which is like a regular martini just made at speed while flying through the air.
So here I was really getting into this when I started loosing altitude, some one had closed the window!! Dropping fast I put my paint-by-numbers away and started panicking. Below were a selection of jars some empty some not but directly below me was this quarter full Ovaltine jar. The neck seemed to be quite thin some kind of special bottle that was mildly like a ketchup bottle. I was hurtling downwards head first into the jar.
I landed head first down in this jar with my bum in the air stuck out waggling. Oh great I thought, now I'm stuck! So I decided to use the momentum of my ample sized beer belly to counter weight the bottle and knock it over, took a couple of swings and it was over knocking a few other jars in the process, from what I remember it was a bit like when you set up dominos and knock one down.
Anyway here I am with my head stuck in a weird shapped jar half walking half rolling around when the human walks in.
I was glad I couldn't speak human. That would have taken some explaining.
Hamster OUT!!
Z xx

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