I was having one of those days, you know the kind, you get up check the fridge and horror of all horrors you have drank all the booze even that wine made from some kind of unmentionable vegetable and flower mix... well that was a bad start to my morning. so I'm a going to Asda and the off license. It meant that my hang over had time to mature (I like to maintain a constant level of drunk you see keeps my head clear) so even the pretty laaaaaaaady hamsters weren't all so pretty and that damn degu was rustling too loud again.
It seemed a good day to go explore, so down my handy tunnel empty bottle in tow, you know in case I find spillages can't waste good booze! I was off to hamster Asda, which to you human things is under the sofa but to us its a great place to shop. Problem is the other hamsters round here don't drink boring things so its fine if you want a hamster delicacy - soggy cheerios and bits of toast but no good for my liquid diet I can tell you!!!
Luckily I have my trusty bottle and pipe, I went off to the spirits cabinet! but this poses risks!! Open ground and 2 silly dogs. The long dog is pretty scared of my pointy teeth the other one just doesn't care are all dogs like this? When I growl they run away raaawwwwwrrrrrr cough cough splutter... I ninja danced all the way to the cupboard, fell over a few oddly placed bits of gravel in the process probably explains why my ear is folded over and have a black eye...
And in the cupboard!! I was there for a while, I think after taking the lid off the bottle of vodka I can't remember much other than waking up with an Alan Titchmarsh cardboard cut out and a duck with no feathers, how that happened I would put down to the fox passed out at the end of my bed...
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